Ranking the 5 Legendary Foods Protein Pastries

Most of the time, protein bars seem to fill more of a functional role than a pleasurable one. You might grab a sweet protein bar because you’re on the go and don’t have time to make yourself an actual meal or because you’re simply trying to get as much protein into your diet in as little time as possible. But wouldn’t it be nice if a protein bar were so delicious that it did more than just fill a hole in your diet? Legendary Protein Pastries do just that. These sweet treats are reminiscent of some of our favorite Pop-Tarts flavors but with a softer texture and much more favorable macros (including a whopping 20 grams of protein) for the more protein-inclined.

I’ve tasted five of these pastries to give you the scoop on which you should try when you’re trying to upgrade your protein game. Honestly, all of them are tasty, so you can’t really go wrong no matter which you choose, but some stand apart in their deliciousness. Since they all have a very similar texture, the ranking for this criteria is mostly based on flavor (although some slight Pop-Tarts nostalgia may have played a role as well). These are Legendary Protein Pastries, ranked.

Usually, when something is “birthday cake” flavored, it just means it’s sickly sweet, covered in sprinkles, and lacking a ton of actual discernible flavor. Admittedly, the birthday cake Legendary Protein Pastry kind of fits into this category, but in the best possible way. The pastry part of the protein bar is super soft and spongy — just like real birthday cake. It doesn’t have a ton of flavor, but it’s mostly just there to provide the structure for the bar anyway. It’s covered in a pretty pink frosting that is, in fact, covered in sprinkles. Opening the package, it immediately looks like a fun treat, a far cry from the sad protein bars of your darkest gym days.

The inside of the pastry, though, is what really shines. You might expect a jelly-like consistency (as you’ll find in many of the other flavors from this brand), but that’s not what you’ll find. Instead, the pastry is filled with what tastes like thick, sugary pink frosting. It doesn’t have a strong flavor at all, but the texture, distinctly frosting-like, is what makes this one appealing. Although there are definitely better flavors available from this brand, I can’t deny that I really enjoyed this bar. Even putting the flavor aside, its festive appearance made me feel like I was going to a birthday party instead of the gym.

If you ate Pop-Tarts as a kid, you’re going to get a blast from the past when you open up a package of strawberry Legendary Protein Pastries. They look so similar to strawberry Pop-Tarts that I was instantly transported back to my childhood, on the school bus, when I was too picky to eat an actual breakfast in the morning. The main thing that sets this pastry apart from a strawberry Pop-Tart, though (besides the macros), is the fact that this pastry is much thicker and softer than its popular junk food counterpart. You may think that would detract from the nostalgic factor, but it really just makes the pastry more appealing.

The strawberry filling is probably what you’re expecting: jelly-like texture, vaguely fruity, but not necessarily discernibly strawberry-like either. The white frosting with colorful sprinkles doesn’t seem to do much for the pastry in terms of flavor, but it does evoke that strawberry Pop-Tart image and make the snack a bit more appealing than it would be otherwise. It’s definitely not the most delicious of the bunch, but if you tend to like artificially flavored strawberry anything, then there’s a good chance you’ll like this, too.

In general, brown sugar cinnamon-flavored treats are usually a bit boring. That’s not because brown sugar and cinnamon don’t taste good together, but simply because these aren’t the strongest, most pronounced flavors. That being said, brown sugar and cinnamon can be appealing to just about everyone, which is why the brown sugar cinnamon Legendary Protein Pastry comes in directly in the middle of this ranking.

This pastry, like the others on this list, is quite soft, and it’s filled with a brown sugar and cinnamon-flavored mixture that has a jelly-like consistency. The top of the pastry is covered with a layer of hard frosting and a sprinkling of extra cinnamon. It’s undeniably more delicious than a brown sugar cinnamon Pop-Tart, and unless you really, really hate cinnamon, you’ll probably enjoy it. Are there more interesting flavors from Legendary to try? Definitely. But if you’re looking for a protein-filled treat that’s going to please just about everyone, you should definitely check this flavor out.

I’m not always a big fan of fruity-flavored processed foods, but I have to admit that Legendary’s blueberry Protein Pastry is absolutely an exception. I’d never been a big fan of blueberry Pop-Tarts, so I wasn’t really expecting to like this pastry as much as I did, but the flavor is incredibly well-balanced. The soft pastry isn’t too sweet, which really allows the filling to shine. Like several of the other flavors on this list, the filling has a jelly-like consistency, and it actually tastes pretty similar to actual blueberries. It’s quite sweet, as you might expect, but it also has a lovely tartness to it that makes this option feel lighter and more refreshing than the other flavors I tried.

The top of the pastry is coated in that same hard frosting with blue sprinkles that make it more visually appealing, despite not offering much to the snack flavor-wise. Since this flavor doesn’t seem to have the overwhelming sweetness that some of the others in this lineup do, it’s one that I could easily eat every day.

As much as I love the other Legendary Protein Pastry flavors on this list, none of them even come close to the chocolate cake flavor. This one absolutely stands above the rest, offering a dessert-like experience that you probably never dreamt you could get in a protein bar. Unlike the others on this list, the base of this pastry is chocolate, and once you open the package, it literally smells like actual chocolate cake. The frosting on the outside of the pastry is also chocolate, and it’s dotted with colorful sprinkles that let you know you’re about to dig into a serious treat.

The inside of the pastry, though, is where it really shines. There’s a gooey chocolate filling that oozes out of the pastry, creating an experience that almost seems too decadent for a protein-focused product. If you really want to take it to the next level, put it in the microwave for 10 seconds before you start eating it. That will soften the chocolate filling even more. Yes, it does make it slightly messy, so make sure you have a napkin with you, but that extra bit of heat also turns it into a deeply delicious dessert that feels like it belongs at a restaurant. You’ve never had a protein bar like this before.

I chose these flavors based on availability at local stores in my area. The criteria for this ranking are based on flavor, although I accounted for slight variances in texture between the different flavors. I also considered nostalgia as a factor since these pastries seem to be based on Pop-Tarts, which I had a lot of experience with as a child and could’ve affected my perception of these protein-packed “dupes.”