We’ve all been there: the plates have been cleared, the drinks are down to a bit of watery ice, the bill has been paid, yet we’re engrossed in conversation with the person on the other side of the dinner table. While your server will likely tell you to take your time, you may be left wondering how long it’s acceptable for you to sit and chat, especially if there are people waiting for a table. There are some fine dining rules that are cut-and-dry (and others that are questionable), but the rules on how long you can hang out at a table after you’ve finished your meal are a bit of a gray area.
Chowhound talked with Penny Chua, owner and managing partner of the iconic Lotus of Siam on Flamingo Road in Las Vegas, to get the details on lingering etiquette at restaurants. “Honestly, as long as you’re not the very last table in the place, you’re probably fine lingering a bit,” Chua says. “But personally, if I know a restaurant closes at 10 p.m., I try to wrap things up, pay, and be out by 10:30 at the latest. It’s just out of respect for the staff; most of them are trying to close out their sections.”
She emphasizes the role of awareness, explaining that if yours is the only table left, you are likely the single factor preventing your server from being able to clock out. And if you do come to realize you’ve likely stayed a bit too long (or anticipate that you will), there are some things you can do to make a restaurant more amenable to your lingering.
Overstaying your welcome? How to make it up to your server
Self-awareness can go a long way — if you notice that your server has repeatedly asked if there’s anything else they can get you after you’ve paid your bill, you may have overstayed your welcome. Whether your dining companion won’t stop chatting away, or you’re engrossed in an important conversation that you can’t seem to bring to an end, there are a few things that you can do to make your stay a bit more pleasant for your server. “I always try to be mindful of the staff and the space,” recommends Penny Chua. “For me, that means tipping extra, because I know I’m holding up their time and the table. I also try not to close out my tab unless I’m pretty sure I’m wrapping up.”
If possible, Chua also says it’s a good idea to order another drink or bottle of wine to show your support for the business while you’re lingering at a table. If you’ve already paid your bill but have stayed for an extensive period of time after you’ve closed out, leaving your server an extra tip (it’s best if you can tip cash) can help to show your gratitude. Keep in mind that restaurant etiquette differs in different areas of the world, and don’t be afraid to do a quick Google search to ensure that your lingering time is in line with what’s expected in your location.
